Jesus Loves Judas.

Approval and Acceptance. Many people think they know what these two words mean and therefore how to apply them…but they are sorely mistaken.

I am so burdened by how we as believers treat our brothers and sisters in Christ who sin, or maybe who don’t even sin but have different preferences than us (A preference is something you would prefer to do or not to do, but it is not a life or death issue. Please tell me you wouldn’t choose to die if someone held a gun to your head and asked you to have a sip of wine). That’s were our approval and acceptance begins: with our preferences. If someone has the same preferences as us, we approve of their beliefs and behavior and we accept them. If we disagree with his/her preferences, we make our disapproval VERY clear and even withhold our acceptance (most people would never admit to this, but it is happening over and over again…especially in ministry homes). Our paranoia of sin has caused us to overreact and to alienate ourselves from people who don’t have the same preferences as us, even if “those people” are our own children. We want to make it clear that we don’t agree with what the other person is choosing to do (manipulation), because we are afraid that this particular thing could lead to other issues (this “thing” could be drinking, dating, tattoos, piercings, etc).  In order to make our disapproval clear, we first confront the person. If he/she doesn’t “repent” (and I use that word loosely because, while yes, some have sinned and need to repent, others are simply choosing to do certain things that are not forbidden by Scripture), then the disapproving person goes to the next level: Shunning. This shunning could be little to no communication or just obvious signs that the disapprover is upset and not willing to restore the relationship. Unfortunately, the shunned feels the lack of approval and ultimately lack of acceptance. We call this rejection. And rejection does crazy things to people. Rejection can lead to the “issues” that the disapproving person was trying to keep the shunned from in the first place. So in essence, the disapproving person, through choices of his/her own, has really been the catalyst of the shunned to make sinful choices.

Please understand I am not trying to pass the blame. We as individual people make our own decisions. We are responsible for the choices we make and no one else. However, does that mean that our choices are not ever spurred on by an outside force? No.

We all have unhealed hurts, unresolved issues, and unmet needs that we try to heal, resolve and meet. Sadly, we often self-medicate and turn to alternative methods (sin) to do so. Many times, these hurts, issues and needs come at the hands of someone we have disappointed. The disappointment was communicated in the form of rejection. And rejection wounds deeply.

Jesus NEVER manipulated people with rejection (that is ultimately what rejection is: manipulation). I was thinking about that this morning. Read John 4. Look how he interacted with the Samaritan woman who wasn’t just living with different preferences than Jesus, she was living in sin. And what does He do? Well, look at how she responds to Him. She so senses his love and forgiveness she runs into the town and unashamedly says, “Come and meet the man who has told me everything I have ever done!” Wow! That is some real freedom. Now, Jesus does confront her sin. Obviously. But, he loves her in spite of her sin, and treats her kindly and with respect, never allowing her to feel rejected. She knows what she is doing is wrong; she doesn’t need a sermon on her decision making. That is why Jesus doesn’t even touch on her lifestyle until she brings it up. He addresses her heart: The fact that she needed some serious spiritual and emotional healing. She didn’t need to be shunned to figure out that she was wrong. She knew that. She needed loving correction and that is what Jesus was about. LOVING. Teaching. Not rejection. Not yelling. Not shunning. There is a difference.

Then, think about the fact that Jesus, Who is God and omniscient, asked JUDAS ISCARIOT to be His disciple. He knew Judas was a traitor. He knew Judas would willingly be possessed by Satan. And yet, He still wanted Judas on His team. He never treated Judas differently, even when He knew Judas was stealing money from the poor while a disciple (John 12:4-8). Here is the ironic thing: Jesus NEVER confronted Judas on the stealing. He did prophesy that Judas would betray Him, but none of the other disciples put two and two together. The implication is Jesus NEVER treated Judas differently. The other disciples had no idea. WOW.

Please catch my drift. Confront sin. But love. Be gracious. If a brother or sister in Christ is in sin, don’t disown him/her and don’t make your actions and your statements communicate rejection. Please, be Jesus to your brothers and sisters in Christ. Don’t be a catalyst for self-medication.