Jehovah El Roi: The God Who Sees

During those many days the king of Egypt died, and the people of Israel groaned because of their slavery and cried out for help. Their cry for rescue from slavery came up to God. And God heard their groaning, and God remembered his covenant with Abraham, with Isaac, and with Jacob.

God saw the people of Israel—and God knew. 

Do you feel like the walls are caving in and God's just watching? Like, He doesn't really see you? Do you wish He'd move in faster and rescue you? Do you think He doesn't know the pain you are feeling? Do you feel utterly and completely abandoned and ignored by God Himself?

I truly believe abandonment is the worst, most hopeless feeling ever. And Satan will do whatever he can to get you there. Because if he can get you to believe that God isn't really for you or even likes you, then Satan's got you. He can destroy your life. And he will.

I can't help but think of the story of Hagar. Sarah was not getting pregnant, after being promised by God that she would, and grew impatient and I believe even more ashamed than she already was. I mean...really think about this: We (well us women) either have experienced this or know someone who has. We've tried and tried and tried some more to get pregnant. We use charts, graphs, sticks, and everything else. Our friend tries once and BOOM. And she didn't even want to get pregnant. It's tough. It's infuriating. It's embarrassing. It's humiliating.

Now couple those emotions with the fact that Sarah had probably come to terms with the fact that she was barren. Then God promises children...thousands and thousands of children. I'm sure Sarah told everyone. And if she didn't, she kept it to herself but couldn't wait to get her dignity back. But it didn't happen right away. In fact it didn't happen for years. And years.

So, she rushed the hand of God and gave Hagar to Abraham in hopes that she would give him a son. As you can imagine, this didn't go well for Hagar when she did in fact bare a son...after one "try". Sarah, who was already marginalized, defeated, depressed, and discarded by her society, cannot handle it. And she takes out her hurt and anger on Hagar by abusing her. So Hagar flees.

That's when God met Hagar. He found her alone, pregnant, scared, insecure, and helpless. He spoke His promises over her life. And she was never the same.

She answered God by name, praying to the God who spoke to her,

“You’re the God who sees me!

“Yes! He saw me; and then I saw him!”

My heart is breaking because I know people need to hear this...God sees YOU. And He knows. He knows the pain you are feeling. He sees what's been done. He sees. He knows.

And He's coming for you. Just wait. Your Rescuer is on His way.

The passages of Scripture are taking from Exodus 2 and Genesis 16.

Just a Season

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven."

- Ecclesiastes 3:1

Just a season. This too shall pass.

I am going to tell you, some days I cling to those 7 powerful words. Don't you? Some seasons in our lives just suck. There's no other way to put it.

• You are struggling with grades, friends, identity, you name it - in high school. Yeah. Those four years are rough. Awful sometimes. It's a season. Hang in there. I promise, the best is yet to come. Dig your roots down deep in your youth group. If you don't have one, find one. Probably some of the most influential people in my life were my mentors in high school. They don't know it, but I think of them often and remember that during that time, they were my lifelines.
• You are 21 and still single. Seems like a lifetime, doesn't it? Been there. In fact, I was 23 when I met Bryant (or 24...I can't remember and I am terrible at simple math). When I graduated from college, I had only had one official boyfriend (a few "going steadies" in between) and most of my friends were already married with a child and number two on the way. No lie. I felt like the Apostle Paul: I had the gift of celibacy. When I moved to Florida, I was so lonely at times. I second guessed my personality, looks, you name it. And what's funny? I was only 23. If you are in this boat, I am not patronizing you. I get it. But it's a season. Just a season. Fill your single years with as much as you can. Start pursuing your dreams. Take a chance. I moved down to Florida from New York and took a job at a respectable school when I was only 22 and after a pretty severe breakup. I was scared to death. Best decision I made. Cause then I met Bryant...on a blind date...and the rest is history :)
• You are recently married and facing marital trouble. Been there. Our first year was no picnic. And don't roll your eyes at me! When we actually start telling our story, you will probably be shocked. It was awful. But it was a season. We sought counselling, experienced real healing, and I'm going to be honest, I understood the ramifications of the Gospel during that season more than any other time in my life. It was the most sanctifying, healing, horrifying, exhilarating time in our lives. And our marriage is strong and healthy now as a result. A season.
• You were diagnosed with clinical depression or some sort of personality disorder and/or anxiety disorder. Been there. I was diagnosed with clinical depression shortly after we got married (hence some of our difficulties). That's when I jumped head first into counselling. Yes, I was embarrassed by the label. I hated it. But it forced me - I mean absolutely demanded - into the grace, love, and unconditional forgiveness of Christ. My depression still beats me up. But it's just a season. I know during those times to reach out to my closest friends for prayer. I speak honestly with Bryant. And I schedule a counseling appointment. Yes, even after four years, I still see my counselor. It's a season.
• You have a newborn. Need I say more? Listen, it's a season. Now he/she is a toddler. It's a season. I so appreciate Instagram right now. You know why? I have some honest mommy friends who share their real stories of frustration, pain, exhaustion, excitement, and happiness through pictures. I don't feel so alone. And we can be praying for each other and encouraging each other that this is just a season. One day, when we are 50 and empty-nesters, we are going to miss these days. Sometimes I don't believe that, but I take the word of my more "seasoned" friends :). Hang in there mommy and daddy. Soak in those precious moments. Laugh at the aggravating ones. It's a season.
• You are divorced or have faced (are facing) some sort of loss. My dear, dear brother or sister...It's a season. Please do not think for a moment that God has abandoned you. That's what Satan wants you to think. He wants to destroy your life and the fastest way to do that is to isolate you from your Heavenly Father who probably doesn't seem that loving right now. This is cliche, but grasp a hold of His promises from the Word of God: His mercies are new every morning. He's never going to leave or forsake you. He wants to give you abundant life. Find some friends who can have faith for you during this time. Hurt. Bleed. But then cling. Cling to Him. It's just a season.

You were diagnosed with cancer. You've just moved for the hundredth time. You have trouble making and keeping friends. You have to pull away from a person who is doing you and your family some harm. You lost your job. You quit your job. You can't make ends meet. You are making more than you ever have. Seasons. These are all seasons. I have friends in almost every one of these categories. Dear friends. Friends that I hate seeing hurt. Friends that feel so alone. And all I can say, dear one, is that God is with you. He knows. 

One of my favorite verses in the Bible is Exodus 2:25. The Israelites were experiencing brutal slavery and felt like God was no where to be found. But this verse says so eloquently:

God saw what was going on with Israel.

God understood.

So I leave you with this...not a theological argument for God's presence, not a ton of Scripture for you to memorize, not another Bible study or list of things to do. Just this: God sees. God knows. God understands. God's with you. It's just a season. Hang in there dear friend.

"There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity

under heaven:

A time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

a time to kill and a time to heal, 

a time to tear down and a time to build,

a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

a t time to search and a a time to give up,

at time to keep and time to throw away,

at time to tear and time to mend,

at time to be silent and a time to speak,

a time to love and a time to hate,

a t time to war and a a time for peace."

- Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

Carpe Diem

Bryant is doing a series right now entitled Carpe Diem...and it has been awesome!!! His talk yesterday was on Sabbath rest. And I just thought I would take a few minutes to share some practical things we do as a family to practice Sabbath rest.

Disclaimer: I am not tooting my own horn here. Nor are we perfect at this all of the time. It takes practice. Compromise. Tweaking. It depends on the season of life you are in. Soul searching. And prayer. So before you keep reading this, hit the link above and listen to Part 3. Then come on back :)

1. A few months ago, Bryant and I both removed the Facebook app from our phones. And wow. The difference that has made. We still keep Twitter and Instagram on our phones because honestly, they don't stress us out as much. You have to know yourself. And speaking for myself here, I know that I am much too nosy and too easily carry other people's burdens that access to Facebook 24/7 just doesn't work for me. I also have a hard time turning off my brain at night and Facebook is another form of email for me. So it was consuming my life. We have seriously noticed a difference in our own peaceful existences since we removed Facebook.

2. We say no. A lot. We are a family of three with one on the way. And we determined before we ever started having children that our marriage and our kids would be our two greatest investments into Eternity. Consequently, the only evening meeting either Bryant or I have is our staff meeting Monday night. Other than that, Bryant is home every evening by dinner time. We also made the commitment that I would be a stay-at-home mom. So, we have learned to live on less. And it works! Bryant keeps a tight budget where we give, save, and live off of the rest and I am so appreciative (and yes, believe it or not, a budget does contribute to Sabbath rest)!!! And finally, since I became the Children's Ministry Director at Centerpoint, I have designated two Sabbath days for myself: Friday with Bryant and Brooke and Monday with Brooke. And, I don't feel guilty about it. I work my butt off from Tuesday to Thursday cleaning, doing laundry, taking care of Brooke, working from home on the ministry, cooking, taking care of Bryant, and so on. And I work. Hard. So on Monday, I lay on the couch and read and/or write every time Brooke is taking a nap and usually don't change out of my pjs until 3pm. I put no pressure on myself to get anything done. On Friday, Bryant, Brooke and I spend the whole day together with no responsibilities.

Bryant decided a few months ago to start taking Friday off. He feels much more alive and relaxed come Friday than he did taking Monday off. So Friday we just hang. I turn my phone off. Bryant puts his on silent and keeps it in the bedroom the majority of the day. We don't get on Facebook or really any social media. And it is awesome! I am going to tell you, for us, taking a Sabbath day off is sometimes hard work and a major trust issue. But we know that God mandated this and we have so experienced the benefits of it that we make Sabbath rest an HUGE priority. Our family, church, and personal lives benefit and are the proof of what God does when we follow in obedience to this command. It is a chance for us to declare our dependence on God and to remind ourselves that He is ultimately in charge and responsible for whatever He has called us to. It is our way to surrender.

Bryant and I do make time for friends, but we probably wouldn't be considered social butterflies. We realize this season with Brooke and baby on the way is one of the most crucial and so our social lives are mainly consumed with our family, our community group, and a few close friends. That hasn't always been the most popular decision, but it has paid off for our marriage and our little family.

We also try to have regular date nights. And if we don't get out, we spend every evening together just relaxing after Brooke goes to bed. It is delightful!!! I am working on turning my phone off after 6:30pm and leaving it off. Bryant is much better at that than me.

3. We make time to get spiritually refreshed. We both spend time reading and try to keep each other accountable with that. We also love attending conferences together and sharing podcasts. Yes, we are nerds. But we also realize the importance of staying above the waters spiritually. And so we make that a priority. For me personally, that means that I have to cut back on the amount of time I exercise now that my time is limited with a little one. That was hard at first, but my investment into my spiritual life is way more vital than my investment into my physical life. I still make time to exercise, but my physical muscles may not be as cut as my spiritual muscles, and that's the way it should be. Bryant is a master at this. I always see him reading the Word, listening to worship music, getting fed on podcasts or books, and constant in prayer. He has such an intimate relationship with Jesus, it's inspiring.

4. We limit our schedules. I am a wife and a mom. Whatever time I have left, I schedule wisely remembering my best has to go to my family. So, I have openings for about two meetings/get-togethers a week and sometimes I don't even do two. Right now I serve as Children's Ministry Director, which is a pretty big job. So, that is where most of my excess time and energy goes. That's it. I have said no to other engagements, outings, and hobbies. It's not always easy, but I know it's best. And I know it's just a season (for more on this, see Just Say No). I remember that Brooke is my greatest contribution to Eternity. I realize that by caring for my husband and making home a safe place, I energize him to reach others with the Gospel. And that is enough for me.

Bryant has already scheduled time off for this year. He does this in advance so it happens on purpose and doesn't get overlooked. He also makes sure he communicates with his assistants his openings for the week. He doesn't counsel everyone (notice I didn't say anyone). He doesn't answer every phone call, text and email he gets at night after he gets home. In fact, he doesn't even get work emails to his phone. He guards his days off. And that is why he is such a good husband, father, and Pastor. He is not a frazzled, drained mess. He is rested both physically and spiritually so he can care for the family and Church God has entrusted him with. And I know a couple hundred people who are extremely grateful. Something he does do that I just think is awesome is after he preaches on Sunday, he hangs in the worship center so he can meet and talk with people. He also sits in the back during worship before he preaches. I have seen so many grown men walk past him and give him the biggest bear hug ever. We also have a swing and some toys in his office so before and after service, he gets time with Brooke.

So, those are just a few things. I could add more to the list: Like we both have certain routines at night to help us unplug and unwind, we make everyday errands an adventure, and we constantly try to stay thankful. But the biggest thing I think you need to come away with is this is a lifestyle that will enable you to worship God more consistently and effectively. By saying yes to the right things and no to the excess things, you are actually going to further your influence. So take some time to figure out what the big rocks in your life are. And minimize the smaller rocks (if you are confused by "rocks", listen to the podcast). If you are a parent, remember your kids are watching. Their lives are being shaped by the decisions you are making. That's sobering.

Remember, Sabbath Rest is a trust issue. Are you brave enough to do something about it?

Immanuel

Christmas. For some of us, this season fills us with childlike joy and excitement. The lights, parties, decorations, cookies, presents, family members…everything about Christmas energizes us and leaves us counting down the months until December. Maybe we don’t even wait until December…maybe we deck our halls in November. Heck, some of us wish we worked in Christmas Shops so we never had to go without the holiday!

And for the rest of us, this season is a stark reminder of all the ways we have failed and the fact that we are alone. Whether we have lost a family member, been harshly separated from one, or feel as though we have failed our families, we would rather close our eyes and fast-forward through this holiday that seems to be a vain attempt to mask the pain for a month. Reality sets in thirty days later reminding us of our failures and aloneness.

But maybe we have forgotten the true meaning of Christmas. Sure, you’ve heard that before, haven’t you? “Let’s remember the reason for the season!” “Keep CHRIST in CHRISTmas!” We put up the nativity scenes, we read through Luke 2, we tell our children this is Jesus’ birthday, we say “Merry CHRISTmas!” and not “Happy Holidays!”. But has it all become so rote that we truly miss out on one of the most fundamental crux’s to our faith? Have our traditions and catchy phrases numbed us to something more?

Isaiah 9:6 says, “For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government shall be upon his shoulder, and his name shall be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”

Go back in time with me…stand from afar and watch as Mary, who is full term now, tries to find a comfortable position on the donkey while she fights her contractions. You can see the pain written across her face. But this isn’t just the pain from the contractions…she has been ridiculed, doubted, and abandoned by her community due to this pregnancy. She’s young…under 20 years of age young. Get a glimpse of her thoughts…what kind of delivery will this be? What does a baby conceived by the Holy Spirit look like? Will Joseph be able to love this boy? Does he still love me because he wants to or because he has to now? Will we be good parents?

Watch Joseph’s face as he frantically looks for the smoothest part of the dusty dirt road while at the same time hopelessly searching for a suitable location for Mary to deliver. The past ten months have been nothing short of Hell for his reputation. But he loved Mary…he believed God…and he would love and raise this boy as well. He made his mind up months ago and he was determined to stay to the course.

Now, come with me into the stable, the most unlikely maternity ward. Listen to Mary scream as she starts to push. Hear Joseph console her. Watch as their son enters the world a takes his first breath. Joseph, an unfit midwife, runs to get water and whatever clean linens he can find. Mary, relieved the worse is over, takes a deep breath and clings to her son.

Do you see the look in her eyes as she stares at him for the first time? She knows that the baby she is holding was conceived by the Holy Spirit. She was told He was the Son of God, that He would save His people from their sins, that He, this tiny life whose fingers were wrapped around her one finger, whose very existence was dependent on her now, that He would be called “Immanuel, which means, God with us.”

Joseph runs back into stable with little pieces of cloth he got from the Inn next door…these linens were probably dish rags. No matter. He needed something with which to clean his son and make sure he was warm. His son. Funny how everything changes when you see that little person for the first time. This was his baby. Held by his wife. The ridicule and embarrassment seemed nothing to Joseph now.

He catches Mary’s eye and they both freeze. The enormity of what just happened is beginning to sink in. They can’t speak, because neither of them have the words. They don’t really know how this all happened, or what they are supposed to do now, or what their future is going to look like. All they know is that they have each other and this precious life, “Immanuel, God with us.” God with them.

Over the next 33 years, Mary would watch the most fascinating life that ever walked the face of the earth. She would see Him change water into wine, heal blind men, raise people from the dead, cast out demons, and feed thousands. She would watch as He graciously interacted with prostitutes, tax collectors, sinners, and lepers. She would hear Him condemn the righteous and religious. And then, she would see Him nailed to a cross. The same person she held in her arms that night in a stable, would have His arms outstretched on a Roman cross. Was this how it was supposed to end? This wasn’t what she signed up for. She thought the Messiah would come and establish His Kingdom. She thought she would be spared from heartache. What was God doing? Was she missing something? She had lost everything for Him. Her reputation, her family, her peace of mind…and now for what? How could God do this to her? How could He do this to her?

And then…three days later…everything changed.

Three days later, Mary saw her son. Oh, but He was no longer her son. No, now He was her Savior. And everything made sense. Her confusion, her pain, her aloneness, her isolation…all of it culminated in the moment she saw Him alive. She got it. She understood why her son, the Messiah, had to die.

So He could offer scandalous grace to those who do not deserve it. To those who truly believe they are too broken, too dirty, too wayward, too unreligious, too unworthy, too unacceptable.

To those who think God could never love them, Jesus Christ is God with Us and proved otherwise. Jesus Christ is the living proof that God desperately wants a relationship with you…with me.

But we fight Him. We fight the Savior of the world. We would rather try to convince Him that we aren’t worth it, while He holds open His outstretched, pierced hands and claims otherwise.

What are you waiting for? Why not give in to a love that has the power to heal you at your depths. Why not surrender to a peace that calms the raging storms within you. Why not?

What do you need this Christmas? I guess the better question is: Who do you need this Christmas? Do you need someone to guide you through a new season, someone to give you answers to the tough questions ahead, someone to tell you how to handle that difficult situation? Then you need a Wonderful Counselor.

Do you nee a miracle? Do you need strength to face another day? Are you not sure how to get around the obstacles in your path? You need a Mighty God.

Do you need to feel safe and secure again? Do you need a protector, a comforter, and encourager? Do you need to feel loved and unconditionally accepted? Then you need an Everlasting Father.

Maybe you need a Savior. Maybe you are at the end of your rope…you know there is a God, but you have no idea how to interact with Him or why He would even want to be with you. All you know is that this can’t be all there is to life. You are drowning in darkness and you see no escape. You need a Prince of Peace.

Jesus Christ came to earth as a baby, lived a perfect life, and died on the cross for YOU. He died because He wants a relationship with YOU and the only way to make that happen is to pay for your sins once and for all. He proved He was capable of that when He rose from the dead three days later. Call out to Him. Tell Him you believe! Tell Him He is your Savior. It is that easy! And rest in the presence of Immanuel, God with Us.

Shielding the Triggers (Part 4)

Ephesians 6 lists the shield of faith as one of the pieces of armor to use in defense against the attacks of Satan. Why? I love what Beth Moore says, "When we are convinced that God is believable and we respond to Him in faith, practically nothing can get through to us. But when our faith diminishes, our shield begins to drop, and we are immediately vulnerable to the enemy. Satan will stop at nothing to get us to lower our shield of faith so he can wound and burn us. He stacks up tangible evidence in opposition to God's assurances. He delights in doubts and lies. He studies our weaknesses and then aims where we're vulnerable. His priority job description is to keep us form believing God." And believe you me, he knows our weaknesses. My counselor calls them triggers...you know, those things that seem to come out of nowhere and cause us to become emotionally unraveled. But wouldn't it be awesome if, as soon as we sensed a trigger go off inside of us, we grabbed our shield of faith and started preaching the Gospel to ourselves? What if we immediately began rooting and established ourselves in the love of God so that our emotions couldn't take us every which way?

Psalm 25:15 says: “My eyes are ever on the LORD, for only He will release my feet from the snare.” Triggers are lies of the enemy to believe that we have unmet needs, unresolved issues, and unhealed hurts that are only going to be met by getting our own way. And so, we respond to these triggers by self-medicating. We get angry, abusive, lustful, hungry, depressed, anxious, manipulative, wounded, and selfish, you name it. We turn to ourselves or others as our savior. And we get trapped in the snare of the deadly cycle. We have to choose to take our eyes off of those things that we think we are owed, want, or even believe we need. We need to center our attention on our loving God. You see, this verse comes after “No one whose hope is in You will ever be put to shame…” and “Good and upright is the LORD, therefore He instructs sinners in His ways. He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them His way. All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful.” If we don’t really believe that those verses are true, we will never, and I mean never, refocus our wandering eyes onto our God. We will never preach the Gospel to ourselves. We will never root and establish ourselves in His love. We will never experience freedom from fear.

According to Andy Stanley, “Every good thing that comes your way comes from your Heavenly Father – which is all the more reason to take your unmet needs, your heartfelt needs, and even your embarrassing wants and wishes to him. Will you go to God with these or just keep trying to wring them out of those closest to you?”

Going to God and not harboring or wringing takes strength and discipline. The strength part is taken care of according in Ephesians 6:10, which follows the verses on the shield of faith: “Finally, be strong in the Lord and in His mighty power” (italics mine). I don’t need to be strong in and of myself in order to face my fears. Think of the worst case scenario for the situation you are trying to control in order to avoid abandonment. Pretty bad, isn’t it? Okay, now realize that right now that seems impossible for you to face – because (and I hate to be Captain Obvious) you don’t have to face it right now. Perhaps this is why One oh so much wiser than the rest of us said to not worry about tomorrow…today is enough. We have more than enough strength and grace (2 Corinthians 12:9) to deal with today. However, we are never going to make it if we don’t decide to discipline our minds on the love of God. Train your mind to trust that God is Sovereign. Even though you may think you are in control, you are not. Those things you dread could happen regardless of whether or not you submit to God’s sovereignty and love…so why not just rest in His omniscience and omnipotence? Trust is simple…when you begin to worry or to grow angry or jealous or greedy, remind yourself that God, Who knows everything and Who will ultimately work His will for your good and His glory, loves you and will do what He (as God of the universe) deems necessary. Let me remind you again, this will happen regardless of whether you “allow” Him to or not. Rest in His love for you.

Fear and Faith (Part 3)

Romans 5:8: "But God demonstrated His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

Ephesians 2:4-5: "But because of His great love for us, God, Who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions - it is by grace you have been saved."

1 John 4:9-10: "This is love - not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as the atoning sacrifice for our sins."

Selah. I mean, what can I even say after those verses? Did you stop and really meditate on what these verses are really, I mean really, saying? God proves His own love...HIS LOVE...His very own love...for US. How did He prove it? When I was in the middle of the worst sin I will ever commit, the one sin I will be afraid He will never forgive, the one sin I will forever be ashamed of...He died for me. Because He wants to be with me.

Selah.

Not only that, but because of His GREAT love for me, He made me ALIVE. That's right. He took away my old life filled to the brim with sins (past, present and future sins) and gave me Christ's life. That means that when God looks at me, He doesn't see Nicole. He sees Jesus. He doesn't see the years I battled with depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts. He doesn't see the years I almost destroyed my marriage and family. He sees Jesus’ perfection. He doesn't see the sins I am going to commit in the future and be so ashamed of. Nope. He sees Christ. I mean, what?! And...I love this. He initiated all of this love first and foremost. It's His love that defines our relationship. It's not a mutual love. Nuh-uh. It's only Him. And that's great news. Cause I am going to fail and my love is going to go MIA. But He's still going to be there. Cause it's His love. Not mine.

It's a funny thing...as I begin to bask in His love for me, my fear of abandonment begins to disappear.

That's why God's Word says that perfect love casts out all fear. But I cannot do any of this without faith. I have to believe that God loves me and hang on to that belief, especially when I experience pain from my own decisions and/or somebody else's.

Hebrews 11:6 says it's impossible to please God without faith. We have to believe that He truly does exist and rewards those who seek after Him. What's the reward? What we have already studied: A life without fear. If you read on in Hebrews 11, you will see person after person who did extraordinary things in the face of real danger because they believed God loved them and had a plan and a purpose for their lives. They found their identities not in things found on this earth, but in Jesus Christ. Hebrews 11:13-16 explains, "All these people were still living by faith when they died. They did not receive the things promised, they only saw them and welcomed them from a distance. And they admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. People who say such things show that they are looking for a country of their own. If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country - a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for He has a prepare a city for them.” I love that. They could have returned at any point to the people and things that they thought could fulfill them here on this earth. But they knew better. They rooted and established themselves in the love of God and by faith accepted the plans and purposes He had for their lives. Therefore, they were able to live without fear. But living by faith is not easy. It is a moment by moment decision.

Love Without Fear (Part 2)

This cycle (read Fear: The Catalyst Emotion) even bleeds over into our relationship with God...we feel as though that is how He interacts with us. While we do good, He accepts us and loves us and wants to be with us. When we mess up, He disapproves and so no longer accepts us and would rather we not be around. And so we run. We become the Prodigal and push God far, far away so that we are not abandoned by Him, but instead reject Him to remain in control.

However, we can also become the legalist...constantly attempting to prove to God that we are acceptable...we are worthy...He shouldn't abandon us. We are fostering a relationship birthed completely out of fear of God abandoning us and consequently fueled by us attempting to manipulate God into "liking" us.

You see, our fear of abandonment grows out of our knowledge that we are not able to measure up to anything for anyone. We know ourselves. We know we are going to let people down because we let ourselves down. We are so aware of our own struggles we truly believe that if anyone really knew us inside out, he/she wouldn't love us...especially not the God of the Universe. And so we strive to give off some sort of air of perfection...whether in our homes, our jobs, our finances, our schooling, our religion, or our extracurricular activities. If we can find a way to accept ourselves, then surely someone else will be able to accept us. And yet, the cycle continues.

It isn't until we come to fully accept God's unconditional, unwavering love for us that we will be able to love Him and love others without fear. I wrote this in my journal the other day: "God does not see me the way I see myself. He loves me greatly! He has made me alive and desires and intimate relationship with me." I had just read Ephesians 3:17: "So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power together with all the saints, to graph how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge - that you may be filed to the measure of all the fullness of God." I continued in my journal, "I have to be rooted and established in the love of God in order to grasp the extent of His love." Did you catch that? I realized that if I didn't plant myself securely in the fact that God loves me like a crazy person, then I wasn't ever going to fully understand just how much He loves me. Reread that sentence if you need to. I need to.

I looked up the word "rooted". It means, "The part of a thing attaching it to a greater or more fundamental whole. The basic cause, source, or origin of a thing. The essential substance or nature of something." Wow. The only way I am going to experience wholeness is by attaching myself to the love of God. If I do not allow His love to wash over me and to fill in all of the empty spaces caused by a lack of love and acceptance somewhere in my past, I will constantly be looking to other people and/or things to complete me, and, as we read earlier, that only causes conflicts and deadly cycles. The passage in John 15 about the vine and the branches is beginning to make more sense now, huh? The word "established" takes the concept of being rooted in God's love one step further: "Having been in existence for a long time and therefore recognized and generally accepted. Having taken root - growing well." I love that. Not only do I have to attach myself to the love of God, I have to be "growing well" in it. What does that mean? I need to constantly be preaching the Gospel to myself...especially when I fail. I have no choice but to meditate on God's love for me.