Do I Have Any Rights? Part 2

So today I read John 1:11-13:

"He came to His own, and His own people did not receive Him. But to all who did receive Him, who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God, Who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God."

How awesome is that? The day after I am convicted about feeling as though I am entitled to certain rights from God and from others, I realize that I do have one divine right to center my entire life around:

I have the right to be a child of God.Amazing. What does this mean? Romans 8 breaks it down for me. The following facts need to be ingrained into my heart and mind over and over again because I am up against Satan, the Adversary. He will use every manipulation and deception possible to steer me away from the most powerful truth in all of Scripture: I have Christ's life inside of me because I am a child of God. What does this mean practically?

1. I am no longer condemned by sin and Satan, or God Himself. God condemned sin in His Son on the cross so that the righteous requirement of the law is fulfilled...in me!!! Let that sink in for a minute. v.1-8

2. I am in the Spirit. The Spirit of Life (the Holy Spirit - Who is God) - Who raised Christ from the dead - dwells in me!!! Again, pause and reflect. You don't need to feel this...you probably can't feel this...just believe it...by faith! Remember, Hebrews says it is impossible to please God without faith. v. 9-10

3. I am not in debt to sin. I don't owe, am not tied to or enslaved to sin. In other words, I don't have to sin anymore! How freeing! v.11-14

4. I am a child of God. I am not enslaved to fear or to sin. I am not a child of Satan, who is the Father of lies. I have the right to call myself a Child of God, and an heir of all that God has (read Ephesians 1 and Colossians 1). v.15-17

These truths will revolutionize our lives...if we grab a hold of them by faith and constantly remind ourselves of them when we are tempted to believe otherwise. I am a child of God. I have that right. By faith, I am claiming this right today, and everyday, from now till eternity.

Do I Have Any Rights? Part 1

I am not going to lie...I often believe I have rights. I mean, be honest, don't you? If you are thinking, "No, I really don't." Than riddle me this: Why do you get hurt, angry, stressed, or depressed? Because...you think you are entitled to certain outcomes, and when you don't get those outcomes, all Hell breaks lose. You with me? Personally, this is precisely why I struggle to forgive, to extend grace, and to surrender to God. I feel like He owes me and so do people. How arrogant of me! No wonder there are times in my life when it feels like God is against me...James 4 explains He is directly opposed to the proud - but intimately close to the humble. Yikes.

I was reading in Job yesterday. Here's a dude that has it all...a big family, a lot of money, a huge tent (equivalent to house...haha...for some reason that cracked me up), and a loaded camel (car - funny to me too...sorry). In Job 1:6-12, God calls Satan into His Throne Room and basically challenges Satan to a duel. Let this sink in for a second...God is so confident in His character and sovereignty, that He gives Satan permission to utterly destroy Job's life. Wait a minute...come again? Yeah, God, in His confident sovereignty and immutability, believes enough in His own goodness to tell Satan to wreck Job. I am not sure if you are frightened or comforted by that thought. In a strange way, I am frighteningly comforted. Here is the crazy thing...God is also confident enough in Job's character to know that he will rely on God's fixed and stable character to define his circumstances and not to allow the circumstances to define God's character. Wow.

In verses 13-19, four servants inform Job, one after the other mind you, that everything he has was just destroyed. Everything. Gone. In a matter of minutes. What Job does next hit me hard yesterday..."He fell to the ground and worshipped." I just had to stop typing for a second and take a deep breath. Wow. He explains, "Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked shall I return. The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord."

We have heard that verse a thousand times, haven't we? But think about what Job is saying here. He realized he is entitled to nothing (he came into the world naked - with nothing - and would leave naked - with nothing), but that God is the Sovereign Creator and entitled to everything...even worship during a disastrous season.

Here's the crazy thing...Job admits in 2:10 that he and his wife have experienced "evil", which literally means "disaster", from God. However, Job questions, "Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?" Job had a proper view of life because He had a proper view of God. God's character defined Job's circumstances. God's character defined how Job viewed himself. God's character kept Job alive when death looked more promising.

Job's view of God and of life was counter-cultural. In fact, in light of all that has just happened to Job, his wife questions God and Job's friends question his character...they think he sinned! What?! Job just clung to the truth: "I am allotted months of emptiness, and nights of misery are appointed to me..." God allowed this season, and Job accepted it as from His hand...pain and all...resting in His sovereign, good, character.

Amen and selah.

Playing the Clown Part 2

So I can't get past the life changing message in 2 Chronicles 20 (who would have ever guessed there was such awesome stuff in Chronicles? Who even knows where Chronicles is in the OT?).

To get caught up with this blog, read "Playing the Clown" below. We know that King Jehoshaphat is up against an army he cannot defeat. He cries out to God and makes the statement: "We are powerless against this great horde...we do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you."

God responds: "The battle is not yours but God's...You will not need to fight in this battle. Stand firm, hold your position, and see the salvation of the Lord on your behalf." Wow. I can't get over God's answer. He says in essence, "You can't do it. You will fail. Watch me do my thing."

In The Complete Green Letters by Miles J. Stanford, I read: "If I am to be like Him, then God in His grace must do it; and the sooner I come to recognize it, the sooner I will be delivered from another form of bondage. Throw down every endeavor and say, 'I cannot do it; the more I try, the farther I get from His likeness.' What shall I do? 'Ah', the Holy Spirit says, 'You cannot do it; just withdraw; come out of it. You have been in the arena; you have been endeavoring; you are a failure; come out and sit down; and as you sit there, behold Him, look at Him. Don't try to be like Him, just look at Him. Just be occupied with Him. Forget about tyring to be like Him. Instead of letting that fill your mind and heart, let Him fill it. Look upon Him through the Word. Come to the Word for one purpose and that is to meet the Lord. Not to get your mind crammed full of things about the sacred Word, just come to it to meet the Lord.'"

God wanted to show off to His people. He knew that they could not do anything on their own; only He is self-sufficient. He wanted to prove this to them. So what were they to do during the battle if they weren't going to fight?

2 Chronicles 20:21: "And Jehoshaphat appointed those who were to sing to the LORD and praise Him in holy attire, as they went before the army, and say, 'Give thanks to the LORD, for His steadfast love endures forever."

The army simply praised God! And God blessed...He "gave rest all around".

I love this story because it proves what I know intellectually, but need to be reminded of emotionally. I can do nothing. I am simply a branch. I need to once and for all own my position as resting in the Vine (John 15). The Vine gives the nutrients. The Vine causes the growth. The Vine protects, sustains, and fortifies. The Vine does all the work. I sit there and glean. I praise. I show off the Vine's glory by producing the fruit the Vine gives. I just am because I am a part of the Almighty I Am.

Selah.

Playing the Clown

Why is it so hard for me to accept that God does not need me? I mean, over the past three weeks I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off, trying to get things done. I am exhausted emotionally, physically, and spiritually...emphasis on the emotional.

There is nothing wrong with being busy. Business is a part of life. But my "business" is self-inflicted as a way to find identity. Let's backtrack here for a second...

June 10th: I lose my job (I asked for a part-time position, they don't have any available...bummer).
June 12-15th: I go to the beach with my husband.
June 16th-19th: I clean and organize at home.
June 20th: I jump both feet into a new job.
June 21-24th: I eat, drink, and sleep this new job.
June 25th till now: I have tried to juggle being a pastor's wife, business woman, heath nut, family person, and a believer. I am a bad juggler. I am exhausted.
Honestly, the downhill spiral effect happened after I lost my job. I placed my identity, my confidence, and my pride in my job. No job. No identity. Insert downward spiral. Pathetic, but true (and it sucks that the way that I process is by writing...now all of you know my secret battles. Crap).

You know you are placing your identity in something/someone other than Jesus Christ if you are playing a clown at a circus and juggling. God never meant for us to "juggle" our lives. What is that verse in Matthew 11:28? "My yoke is easy and my burden light." Nothing in there about juggling, anxiety, exhaustion. Just "easy" and "light". Must be nice.

In 2 Chronicles 20, I read that King Jehoshaphat (crazy name) is in a war that he knows he will not win...on his own. He turns to God and cries out for help: "You rule over all the kingdoms of the nations. In your hand are power and might, so that none is able to withstand You...We are powerless against this great horde that is coming against us. We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on You." Wow. To have the courage that Jehoshaphat had to admit that he was nothing apart from God...

Here is God's response: "Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed at this great horde, for the battle is not yours but God's...You will not need to fight in this battle. Stand firm, hold your position, and see the salvation of the LORD on your behalf. Do not be afraid and do not be dismayed. Tomorrow go out against them, and the LORD will be with you."

I love that word "tomorrow". Why? Because today and the past few weeks I have skrewed up. I have thought that God needed me...because I need to be needed. Feel me? I have so many fears and insecurities that I try to temper by being needed, which in my mind is a sure way to evade abandonment. Then I read this by A.W. Tozer: "This truth [that God is self-sufficient and needs no-one], while a needed rebuke to human self-confidence [ouch], will when viewed in its Biblical perspective lift from our minds the exhausting load of mortality and encourage us to take the easy yoke of Christ and spend ourselves in Spirit-inspired toil for the honor of God and the good of mankind. For the blessed news is that the God who needs no one has in sovereign condescension stooped to work by and in and through His obedient children...In the meanwhile our inner fulfillment lies in loving obedience to the commandments of Christ and the inspired admonitions of His apostles. 'It is God which worketh in you.' He needs no one, but when faith is present He works through anyone."

Why faith? Because I have to have faith that God is going to come through for me. Unbelief, Tozer says, is a deadly sin because I am believing in myself, not God. Do I really believe God has got this...whatever the "this" may be in my life at any given time? If so, I will allow Him to dictate my day ("Spirit-inspired toil for the honor of God") and I will be freed up to love and to serve other people ("the good of mankind").

Rest: a word so foreign to me, but the obvious mark that a person has surrendered to the Self-Sufficiency of God and has placed all faith in the fact that God is sovereign and can be trusted and will come through for those Who wait on Him.

Okay...time to put my money where my mouth is. Clown make-up is coming off.

Redeeming Your Past

These past couple of months, I have been reading through the book Captivating with the ladies from my church. It has been a heart wrenching study. The statistics say that in most churches, ¼ women have been abused in some way. Well, on any given week, I sit in a circle of 8-10 women, each one an abuse victim. I want to add that this group was not designated as a “Recovery Group” or anything of the sort. The small group is named and advertised as a “Ladies Bible Study”. Sobering.

I say all that to say that if you have read Captivating, you know it walks women through the somewhat painful process of recognizing wounds, facing wounds, and healing from wounds. Week after week, women shared their stories. Dark stories. Stories that left me emotionally drained. I praise God, however, that the stories were shared. Satan loses his power to accuse and shame when the truth is brought to the light. God’s Truth can then penetrate the pain and set the wounded free!

This is our final week in the study (I am a little relieved…we need to move on, amen?!). However, I have discovered a couple of interesting insights as we have worked through this study that I want to list really quickly and hit on in-depth later…

1. Our wounds are a sort of baggage that we carry and use as a form protection in the way of justification for certain behaviors. Let that sink in for a second. God’s responsibility is to open our eyes to our wounds; our responsibility is to deal with our wounds (read “Living Wounded or With our Wounds”). We deal by either carrying them around with us as a sort of justification for “why I am the way I am”; or, we acknowledge the hurt and the pain and then deal with the wound Biblically: through forgiveness (read “Forgive, Forgiving, Forgiven”). I don’t have to tell you which of the above two options is more emotionally taxing and physically exhausting…you already know.

2. “Security is not found in the absence of danger, but in the presence of Jesus.” We allow our wounds to define us out of fear. We are afraid. “Your lingering disbelief that anything important hangs on your life is only evidence of the long assault on your heart by the one who knows who you could be and fears you.” Who is this “one”? Satan. He is a liar (John 8) and he is out to destroy you (1 Peter 5). If he can get you to believe that you are safer carrying around your wounds, if he can convince you that you are worthless because of your wounds, if he can talk you into believing you will never experience healing from your wounds, he has destroyed you and won. The only way to defeat him is to draw near to Jesus…preach the Gospel to yourself. Remember He died for you, He forgives you, He loves you, He wants you.

3. To redeem our past, we must believe in the transcendence of God. Some of us really struggle with looking back. Hindsight isn’t only 20/20, it sucks. Trust me, I know. However, I have to say this…I was talking with Bryant the other day and he said, “Nicole, can’t you look back though and see that God has been with you every step of the way? He was there…He was leading…He has brought you to this point.” I have to be honest…I don’t always like to think that God was present at every moment in my past, some of it is embarrassing and I wish He wasn’t looking and some of it is so painful I am angry He didn’t step in. But, when I stop for a second and think about where He has me now and when I dwell on all of the blessings He has brought into me life (not because of what I have done, obviously, but because of Who He is), I can’t help but stand amazed and grateful. Have I always been able to say that? No. Healing is a process. I am still in the process, as I am sure you are too. We are moving forward. But, and there are a lot of “buts”, God is with us…right here…right now. You may not see Him, feel Him, hear Him, or believe Him, but I promise you…He is there. Cling to the facts…keep moving forward. Don’t look back until God lets you know it is time…when will that be? I don’t know…He does and He will make it clear to you. In the meantime, just keep telling yourself, “God is here and He loves me.” Simple statements, powerful truths.

Don't Ask for Forgiveness

I am reading Grace Walk by Steve McVey and it is tearing me up...in an awesome way! Today, he was explaining the story of the Prodigal Son and he says this: "I used to believe that this parable was a lesson on forgiveness; but studying it from a grace perspective makes its meaning clear. It's not about forgiveness, but about acceptance."

McVey goes on to explain that the Prodigal felt unworthy because of his rebellious, sinful behavior. He figured his father would only be interested in having his son back as a servant. However, "the story clearly demonstrates that the father had already forgiven him and was ready to fully accept him when he returned home."

We have misrepresented God's forgiveness. When Jesus Christ died on the cross for my sins 2000 years ago, all of my sins were future...right? Let me help you out here...YES! I am only 26. "God didn't deposit forgiveness into an account with my name on it so that I can make forgiveness withdrawals when I need it. When I was born again, He emptied the entire forgiveness account on me! My debt was paid in full!"

And the same is true for you!

1 John 1:9 has been misinterpreted. The word that we have translated as "forgiveness" was "confession" in the original Greek, which means "to agree with". Let me boil this down for you: When you sin, you don't need to ask for forgiveness. Biblically, God has already forgiven you (Jesus died for your sins: past, present, future). Confession means that you "acknowledge the foolishness of disobedience to the Father and then praise Him that you are already forgiven and accepted by Him."

For years I believed that when I sinned, I had to ask forgiveness from God, otherwise a breach would remain in our relationship because He was not happy with me and wouldn't be happy until I realized my sin and cleansed myself of my sin. Do you see how opposed to grace this belief system is? "If Satan can cause you to feel that God doesn't accept you because of bad behavior, he can keep you [far away from God] for a longer time." And this happened to me. I got Galatians 5:16 reversed. I thought I had to clean myself up before I could walk in the Spirit. So, I would stay focused on my sin...doing deep personal analyzation, trying to cleanse myself of my sin by staring it in the face. Only years later did I realize that I was "setting my mind on the flesh, which is death" (Romans 8:6). Freedom from sin does not happen by obsessively thinking and willing myself free...it comes from choosing to believe I am accepted, forgiven, and righteous before God. He loves me, wants me, and pursues me. I can enjoy Him. I can walk in the Spirit and as I do, He will do His work in me. I do nothing. How awesome!

With God, my behavior does not determine my identity. He has already declared my identity is Jesus Christ. I will choose to believe that and as a result, live in victory. Or, I will choose to continue to believe I am just a sinner saved by grace and destined to struggle with sin the rest of my life. The only problem is, "God never intended for the Christian life to be a struggle."

Jason Gray has an amazing song entitled, "I am New". I will leave you with the lyrics.

Now I won't deny
The worst you could say about me
But I'm not defined
By mistakes that I've made
Because God says of me

I am not who I was
I am being remade
I am new
I am chosen and holy
And I'm dearly loved
I am new

Who I thought I was
And who I thought I had to be
I had to give them both up
Cause neither were willing
To ever believe

I am not who I was

Too long I have lived
In the shadows of shame
Believing that there
Was no way I could change
But the one who is making everything new
Doesn't see me the way that I do
He doesn't see me the way that I do

I am new
Dead to the old man

I'm coming alive
I am new

Forgiven beloved
Hidden in Christ
Made in the image of the Giver of Life
Righteous and holy
Reborn and remade
Accepted and worthy this is our new name

This is who we are now...

True Confessions

So this has been an interesting week. Bryant and I were talking after church on Sunday about how we can feel a heaviness on our people's hearts. Last night at Ladies Bible Study, the heaviness was prevalent...and this time, it was in my own heart. It's interesting to me how the body of Christ tends to face the same things at the same times...ironic or Supernatural? God knows we need each other. Just as Moses needed Aaron and the other leaders of the Israelites to hold up his arms during battle, we need our brothers and sisters in Christ to help us stand up in the face of Adversity.

However, last night, I was struggling with my own views of God, and then I was supposed to lead a Bible Study. Awesome. This morning as I was driving to school, I realized that I needed a good dose of the Truth. I am wondering if anyone else does. So here it goes.

Bryant told me the other day that if Satan can thwart our views of God, Satan can ultimately destroy us. Wow. That is a sobering thought. I have to be on guard with how I view God and am interacting with Him as a result. However, two really good questions were raised last night as to how we are to hash out our relationships with God.

1. Why would God allow Satan the chance to influence us negatively toward Him (God)?
2. Why does God ask for all of our trust and then sometimes disappoint us with His answers?

Two really good, tough, necessary questions to ask.

1. God has given us free will. Our free will is the ultimate gift and sign of His unconditional love for us. Why? Because He proves over and over again that He will love us and forgive us and cherish us regardless of whether or not we choose Him. We are also created in the image of God with intellect, will, and emotion. However, our emotions are flawed. Satan preys on these flawed emotions. While God does allow Satan to tempt us and while God doesn't demand certain responses from us, He does give us His Word full of Truth and His character that never changes. He has revealed Himself to us; we have the opportunity to get to know Him for Who He is and then to cling to that knowledge. So God ultimately does protect us from the onslaughts of Satan. We just too often believe our emotions are more powerful than God. 1 John 3:20 says that God is greater than our hearts and knows everything. 1 John 4:4 says that God is greater than Satan. So there you have it: Ultimately God is greater than Satan and our hearts...we just have to choose to believe that when we feel otherwise. He has not given us the spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind (1 Timothy 1:7). You can take that to the bank. 

2. God is the only One Who sees the end from the beginning. God is the only One Who knows absolutely everything. God is the only One. Why does He say no and sometimes perpetuate our pain? Cause He knows. He knows more than me. He knows more than I will ever want to know. He Knows. Again, I have to really ground myself to the Truth of His Word: He will never give me more than I can handle (1 Cor 10:13), He is my faithful and empathetic High Priest Who gets it (Hebrews 4), He will never forsake me or leave me defenseless (Psalm 141). Ultimately, I have to realize that Proverbs 3:5-8 is more than just a nice verse to hang on my wall at home. It is a lifeline. Trust in the Lord. Don't lean on my own understanding. Don't be wise in my own eyes. In all my ways, acknowledge Him...notice this doesn't say I "feel" Him...I acknowledge...acknowledge He is there, He is powerful, He is gracious, He is good, He is loving, He is present, He is safety. He will direct my paths and I will be healed. Where does healing come from? Trusting in Him.

I leave you with a question Stasi Eldredge asks in Captivating:

Is God worthy of our trust?

1 Peter 3:6: Don't give way to fear. Put your hope in God.

Yes, my friend, He is worthy. Cling to Him.

Judgment

I stood before the Judge and plead my case -

I really didn’t have a substantial excuse.

I just didn’t want to live with my past mistakes -

But as I looked into His eyes, His blank stare left me confused.

The Prosecuting Attorney, The Adversary, he was named -

Shot me a smug grin as he approached the bench.

His rebuttals discredited everything I claimed –

It was at that moment that I grasped I was in his clutch.

Desperate, I tried to scream above his hateful accusations.

“I am sorry Judge, I know what I deserve –

I understand I am not good enough for Salvation…

But please, let me be good enough to recompense serve.”

“Ha!” The Adversary exclaimed –

“This woman is insane to make such a request.”

Then he stared me in the eye and growled the following proclamation:

“She deserves nothing less than a life sentence!”

I shamefully hung my head in hopeless submission.

               

                He was right.

But then the Courthouse door flew open.

The Adversary gawked at the One who approached.

This One was not supposed to be alive, and His scars were His token

Of an attempted death penalty revoked.

You see, the Adversary knew that if this Man were killed,

The Adversary would always have the victory over violators like me.

He never considered a resurrection possible-

Until he saw the Advocate standing proudly next to me.

“I paid her life sentence when I died 2000 years ago.

Her penance is paid in full, therefore –

The accusations are null and void,

And the guilt and shame are no longer hers to bear.”

“If You, Judge, decide to make her pay,

Then You will be a violator of the Law -

Whose demands cease when penance is made,

Which is what I did when I died on the cross.”

The Adversary threw up his hands and yelled,

“Dead! Dead! This sinner shouldn’t get a second chance!”
But the Advocate shot him a look that could send him straight to Hell,

“I am alive and I have chosen her and not a consequence.”

The Adversary charged the Advocate

But the Judge ordered the Adversary removed.

You see, the Judge administers justice,

And the scars on the Advocate were justice proved.

I turned my tear stained face toward my Advocate Redeemer,

He looked at me with eyes full of love and grace,

The Judge slammed down the gavel,

And declared me innocent because of the One Who stood in my place.

Deuteronomy 2: God Knows.

I want to share one statement from Bryant's talk on Sunday (listen to his podcast "Come Home" 2: http://www.centerpointfl.org/seriesarchive.php).

God is generous in His grace but thorough in His discipline.

He disciplines, not to pay us back, but to win us back. Okay, so I stole two lines...but only because they mirror God's interactions with His people in Deuteronomy. :)

Remember - Israel rebelled - God had incredible blessings and peace ahead for them. However, all they could see were the obstacles.

He was going to show off His power - they couldn't get past their weaknesses.

He would supply their needs - they couldn't surrender their wants.

Israel forfeited what would've been the most awesome, mind blowing adventure for forty years of wandering in the wilderness. And boy, was it ever a wilderness.

I love Deuteronomy 2:7: "God knows you are going through this great wilderness. These forty years the Lord Your God has been with you. You have lacked nothing."

Wow. God's grace is amazing.

Even though the Israelites were in the wilderness as a consequence of not trusting God, He still protected and cared for them.

Let me reiterate: God still extended grace, mercy, protection and love - the very things Israel refused to accept - because that is Who God is. He knows. He knows we are weak and frail. But He loves us as a perfect Father would love His children.

The author of Hebrews says it best: "The Lord disciplines the one he loves...Therefore life your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees, and make straight paths for your feet, so that what is lame may not be put out of joint but rather be healed."

You want healing? I sure as heck do. We have to do the hard work of repentance. Stop fighting God, realize where we have gone off track, figure out what needs to change, and do it.

See you on the other side.

Is God Fair?

The following in bold is taken from Chuck Swindoll:
Remember those words from Isaiah's pen as he repeats God's message?

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD.
"For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways
And My thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8-9)

Look carefully at the contrasts. There is a vast difference between "My thoughts" and "your thoughts" says the Lord. "My ways" are not like "your ways." They are higher; they are far more profound, deep, mysterious---and I would add, surprising.


Our human ways are based on what seems fair. We firmly believe that when someone does what is right, rewards and blessings result. When someone does what is wrong, there are serious consequences, even punishment. But that's our way, not necessarily God's way. At least not immediately. He's been known to allow unfair treatment to occur in the lives of absolutely innocent folks---for reasons far more profound and deep than they or we could have imagined.


Bryant said on Sunday that fairness is not a Biblical principle...and why not? :) Well, if it were, Jesus would not have been mistreated and crucified for my sin (Isaiah 53:3,7), I would not have Salvation as a result (Isaiah 53:5), nor would I be able to learn to be like Jesus (1 Peter 2:21-25). I guess I need to learn that I don't want "life" or God to be fair...I just want grace and mercy. His thoughts and ways are higher, deeper, better, safer than mine. The pity parties end here.