"God is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18
If you have ever felt abandoned, even in the slightest sense, you have felt utterly broken. Abandonment speaks to the deepest part of us that we are worthless. A sense of worthlessness breeds hopelessness. Hopelessness crushes the spirit. Praise God He is close to and the Savior of the Abandoned!
"I sought the Lord and He answered me and delivered me from all of my fears." Psalm 34:4
Fear is the ball and chain that keeps a person locked in the stronghold of rejection (Abandonment). I want to pause here and get you to think about this...many times we think that the only way to be abandoned or rejected is at the hands of another person. This isn't entirely true. We can also feel abandoned when our ideal of what a family should be crumbles, when our belief system is challenged and doesn't hold up, when a group of people we thought should have handled a situation differently didn't. Countless people have been crushed by broken dreams, faulty religions, hypocritical churches, repeated failure, unfair circumstances, depression, legalism, cancer, and on and on the list goes.
Fear is perpetuated by the constant rehearsal of "What if?" and "If only?"
What if I stay alone?
What if my kids don't choose Jesus?
What if he leaves me?
What if I am wrongfully judged for something out of my control?
What if I can't make it as a single mom?
What if I ruin my family's reputation?
What if someone finds out who I really am?
What if I can't make it in ministry?
What if I do something stupid and can't correct it?
What if I can't cut it?
If only I knew back then what I know now...
If only I could go back ten years...
If only I could tell him/her what I really am thinking...
If only I hadn't married him...
If only I had been there...
If only I had made that promotion...
If only I hadn't gotten pregnant so soon...
If only I had finished my degree...
If only I had a different personality...
If only I were more talented...
Wow...I have to be honest, just reading through those gives me a slight panic attack. God will deliver us from all of our fears, we just have to look to Him.
"Those who look to Him are radiant, and their faces shall never be ashamed. Oh, taste and see that the LORD is good. Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!" Psalm 34:5, 8
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart...It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones." Proverbs 3:5, 8
My question is, who are you feeding? You have two women...the one who is Abandoned and the one who is longing for Acceptance. If you feed Abandonment with fear ("What if?" and "If only?"), you will stay locked in the stronghold of rejection. However, if you call to Jesus in the midst of the fear and look to Him and His almighty power that is available to free you from the darkest of strongholds through faith, and if you feast on His goodness to you by sending His Son to die on the the cross so He could have a relationship with you, you will be freed!
We have to renew our minds. We have to walk in Radical Truth if we seek freedom. Cling to Jesus and the Truth His Word speaks over your life. Feed on Truth, not on fear.
September 9, 2011
September 7, 2011
The Other Woman
Catchy title, huh? Were you hoping for something scandalous? Well, don't be disappointed. You may not realize this, but each of us has an "Other Woman" who is attempting to sabotage our friendships, marriages, children, careers, ministries...really, our entire lives. Who is She?
She doesn't live across the street, but She comes over to your house regularly. You don't talk to her, but She goes to your church. You would never invite her out for coffee or lunch, but She shows up uninvited all of the time. She spends more time with your husband, friends, and your children than you would like. She wrecks the perfect day and steals the joy from any memory. Who is She?
Look in the mirror. If you stare closely enough, you'll see her. She's you.
Women are unique. We are complicated. We are messy. Let's just face the facts. Since the Garden of Eden, we have wanted the control and have bought into every lie in order to obtain control. One of those lies is that we cannot be broken, weak, or vulnerable. The only problem is, because of the sin invested world we live in, we will experience one of these emotions, and most likely at the hands of someone we trusted deeply. So what do you we do? What any good daughter of Eve would do...we stuff those feelings deep down inside and they develop a life, literally a life, of their own. She is the Other Woman.
So often we don't even know She is there. But if you pay closer attention, you will begin to see the figure of a woman emerge from the shadows of pain.
When you live vicariously through your children because you feel like you missed out on something or your life is just so boring, She's there.
When your life centers around your fashion, your cooking, and your decorations, She's there.
When you are scared to death to get to know people and to build intimate relationships, She's there.
When you hide behind activity and ministry because you want to be noticed, She's there.
When you experience bouts of depression, She's there.
When you are suspicious of every person in your life, She's there.
When you can't explain your anxiety or your fear, She's there.
When you think God is out to get you, She's there.
When you can't enjoy God's goodness because you are preparing for the next storm, She's there.
Do you see her? I sure do. If I had children, I could say I can see her in every one of those confessions. She specializes in "What if?" and "If only..." She goes by many names...but her favorite is "Abandonment". Each of us has experienced Abandonment in some way. Usually, the pain is so deep, we do what we can to bury it and escape it. However, any time we feel overlooked, ignored, replaced, mistreated, or hurt, we subconsciously feed Abandonment. The Bible says "a broken spirit dries up the bones." Abandonment breaks our spirits and if we don't allow God to heal us, we will dry up. We have too many dried up woman in our homes, work places, churches, gyms, and schools. How do we experience healing?
Stay tuned.
She doesn't live across the street, but She comes over to your house regularly. You don't talk to her, but She goes to your church. You would never invite her out for coffee or lunch, but She shows up uninvited all of the time. She spends more time with your husband, friends, and your children than you would like. She wrecks the perfect day and steals the joy from any memory. Who is She?
Look in the mirror. If you stare closely enough, you'll see her. She's you.
Women are unique. We are complicated. We are messy. Let's just face the facts. Since the Garden of Eden, we have wanted the control and have bought into every lie in order to obtain control. One of those lies is that we cannot be broken, weak, or vulnerable. The only problem is, because of the sin invested world we live in, we will experience one of these emotions, and most likely at the hands of someone we trusted deeply. So what do you we do? What any good daughter of Eve would do...we stuff those feelings deep down inside and they develop a life, literally a life, of their own. She is the Other Woman.
So often we don't even know She is there. But if you pay closer attention, you will begin to see the figure of a woman emerge from the shadows of pain.
When you live vicariously through your children because you feel like you missed out on something or your life is just so boring, She's there.
When your life centers around your fashion, your cooking, and your decorations, She's there.
When you are scared to death to get to know people and to build intimate relationships, She's there.
When you hide behind activity and ministry because you want to be noticed, She's there.
When you experience bouts of depression, She's there.
When you are suspicious of every person in your life, She's there.
When you can't explain your anxiety or your fear, She's there.
When you think God is out to get you, She's there.
When you can't enjoy God's goodness because you are preparing for the next storm, She's there.
Do you see her? I sure do. If I had children, I could say I can see her in every one of those confessions. She specializes in "What if?" and "If only..." She goes by many names...but her favorite is "Abandonment". Each of us has experienced Abandonment in some way. Usually, the pain is so deep, we do what we can to bury it and escape it. However, any time we feel overlooked, ignored, replaced, mistreated, or hurt, we subconsciously feed Abandonment. The Bible says "a broken spirit dries up the bones." Abandonment breaks our spirits and if we don't allow God to heal us, we will dry up. We have too many dried up woman in our homes, work places, churches, gyms, and schools. How do we experience healing?
Stay tuned.
Do I Have Any Rights? Part 2
So today I read John 1:11-13:
"He came to His own, and His own people did not receive Him. But to all who did receive Him, who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God, Who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God."
How awesome is that? The day after I am convicted about feeling as though I am entitled to certain rights from God and from others, I realize that I do have one divine right to center my entire life around:
I have the right to be a child of God.Amazing. What does this mean? Romans 8 breaks it down for me. The following facts need to be ingrained into my heart and mind over and over again because I am up against Satan, the Adversary. He will use every manipulation and deception possible to steer me away from the most powerful truth in all of Scripture: I have Christ's life inside of me because I am a child of God. What does this mean practically?
1. I am no longer condemned by sin and Satan, or God Himself. God condemned sin in His Son on the cross so that the righteous requirement of the law is fulfilled...in me!!! Let that sink in for a minute. v.1-8
2. I am in the Spirit. The Spirit of Life (the Holy Spirit - Who is God) - Who raised Christ from the dead - dwells in me!!! Again, pause and reflect. You don't need to feel this...you probably can't feel this...just believe it...by faith! Remember, Hebrews says it is impossible to please God without faith. v. 9-10
3. I am not in debt to sin. I don't owe, am not tied to or enslaved to sin. In other words, I don't have to sin anymore! How freeing! v.11-14
4. I am a child of God. I am not enslaved to fear or to sin. I am not a child of Satan, who is the Father of lies. I have the right to call myself a Child of God, and an heir of all that God has (read Ephesians 1 and Colossians 1). v.15-17
These truths will revolutionize our lives...if we grab a hold of them by faith and constantly remind ourselves of them when we are tempted to believe otherwise. I am a child of God. I have that right. By faith, I am claiming this right today, and everyday, from now till eternity.
"He came to His own, and His own people did not receive Him. But to all who did receive Him, who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God, Who were born, not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God."
How awesome is that? The day after I am convicted about feeling as though I am entitled to certain rights from God and from others, I realize that I do have one divine right to center my entire life around:
I have the right to be a child of God.Amazing. What does this mean? Romans 8 breaks it down for me. The following facts need to be ingrained into my heart and mind over and over again because I am up against Satan, the Adversary. He will use every manipulation and deception possible to steer me away from the most powerful truth in all of Scripture: I have Christ's life inside of me because I am a child of God. What does this mean practically?
1. I am no longer condemned by sin and Satan, or God Himself. God condemned sin in His Son on the cross so that the righteous requirement of the law is fulfilled...in me!!! Let that sink in for a minute. v.1-8
2. I am in the Spirit. The Spirit of Life (the Holy Spirit - Who is God) - Who raised Christ from the dead - dwells in me!!! Again, pause and reflect. You don't need to feel this...you probably can't feel this...just believe it...by faith! Remember, Hebrews says it is impossible to please God without faith. v. 9-10
3. I am not in debt to sin. I don't owe, am not tied to or enslaved to sin. In other words, I don't have to sin anymore! How freeing! v.11-14
4. I am a child of God. I am not enslaved to fear or to sin. I am not a child of Satan, who is the Father of lies. I have the right to call myself a Child of God, and an heir of all that God has (read Ephesians 1 and Colossians 1). v.15-17
These truths will revolutionize our lives...if we grab a hold of them by faith and constantly remind ourselves of them when we are tempted to believe otherwise. I am a child of God. I have that right. By faith, I am claiming this right today, and everyday, from now till eternity.
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